Sunday, August 22, 2010

Fear

I cannot begin my musings without describing the fear I have of the Lord. It would make sense to say that my mind understands that the very touch of God can take a life from its body and command it into eternal rest. Yes, I have read and heard. But my eyes have never seen such power taking form through a physical experience. To tell you that knowing these things scares me would be accurate but that is not it's end. And to say that my own mind has an affect on the physical response of my body is also true. But sheerly coming into the presence of this power, knowing that the same power which rose Christ from the dead is flowing through me and running wild in my blood; to feel that power shakes me to my very core. The power calls my heart-beat wild, in alignment with the heartbeat of heaven. Some of this fear is good and is poured from Truth. But something, a different kind of fear, blocks my soul from Oneness. It encourages a fight within me to resist. I do NOT want to resist. I do not mean to contradict the content of these words, that is the fallen man inside.

Who am I to know such presence? My frail body cannot handle it, but every part of it screams for more. Is this the normal Christian life?

I've wasted so many years cursing my body and my soul with depravity, all the while ignorance chained me to darkness (with the help of a few of his friends). But redemption waited so patiently for me as my bood cried out for restoration. The war raged in my veins until His timing was revealed and the angels praised Him as I was made new. And that is when I saw Him. My warrior prince was waiting. His arms reached out to help me up from myself and onto the back of His white horse. Cheesy? Probably. But nothing makes my heart beat wilder (besides the firey presence of God) than the thought of the One on the white horse, coming to redeem my blood by shedding His own. I will finish with this: The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Get some.

1 comment:

  1. I need to tell you about a dream I had many years ago about Jesus on a white horse. Piercing eyes, red/amber/gold eyes!! He was staring into my soul beckoning me to wage war. The armor, the scent of battle...girl what a dream. What an honor.

    Your post was such a time traveling experience. This was a dream that SHOOK me in my sleep- a cold cold shivering blast of the Holy Spirit. The earth was quaking....

    You are awesome.

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